Tuesday, November 29, 2011

When A Writer Designs A Eulogy

The Eulogy I Gave In Memory of Frances Elizabeth Moulds Marquis on November 20, 2011

Dear Sweet Grandma,

In celebration of life, we gather one final time in honor of your memory. 
I have one final gift for you. It could not have been given at a more perfect time. It is the gift of Significance.

By Significance, I mean that you put things in the right places during your time here.
Today, your children, grandchildren, extended family and friends get to marvel without distraction at the magnificence and legacy of your life.

It’s an individual compliment, the sort of thing only each of our solo journey’s can specifically articulate.  Today, the authority I have is in sharing Significance as it relates to my own life, and the way you put things in the right places during your time here.

You taught me love.
Love is the most important thing in the world.  There was never a day you did not love me.  You lived every day to ensure all of us gathered here could stand on your shoulders , live longer, see further and experience more life than you did.  In the end, Love is all that matters.

You taught me acceptance.
During a particularly ornery time in my life, I brought a dear friend with me to visit you. He was a kind and wonderful person, yet the left side of his body was covered in graphic Daunte Inferno tattoos.  The first thing I said after introducing you was pointed out his tattoos.
“Do you see his tattoos?  What do you think?” I asked, putting you on the spot.
You regarded them for a moment.
“They are beautiful,” you said.
You asked many questions without prejudice and my friend went on to share the poem, Daunte’s Inferno changed his life and gave him a passion for English. Through this poem, he was inspired to study English in College and become an English Teacher.
I learned more from that response than you ever knew.  The many times I’ve come across a someone I didn’t understand, rather than judge them, I remembered your words, “They are beautiful.”
That was the secret to my success in working with so many troubled populations.  For some, it was the first time someone recognizing the light inside them.

You taught me peace.  I would fall asleep when I was young as you rubbed my back, listening to every last word I shared.  Like an oasis no matter the storm, that is something that never left me.  This came full circle on our final day together.  We shared our loving words and held hands and you fell asleep as I kissed your face and demonstrated I’d mastered the peace you shared with me so many years ago. 

You enjoyed my sense of humor. You could appreciate a joke and nothing gave me such joy as to have you rolling on some hilarious statement.  When Mom was there, the laughter and joking was amplified.  There is something so special about three generations being in harmony.  I’m going to be classy enough to not share those jokes here, but know that Grandma’s appreciation for wackiness and being outside the box, was fully intact.

Bonding with nature at the oceans, hiking, boating, and engaging in your passion be it writing, dancing, gymnastics or health supplements.  Thank you for always believing in me and convincing me of my gifts.
You encouraged me no matter how ridiculous some may have considered it.  You were never the person to tell me I couldn’t do something.  When I wanted to read half the books in California, you were the person who took me to the library each day as I attempted to read one book every evening.

You taught me about Bravery.  Our final conversation, I told you, “Grandma, don’t be scared.” For I know there is nothing but love, belonging and light where she would be well received.  Her eyes met mine, clearing for the first time all day. “I’m not.” She said.  

Thank you for being patient with me and sharing in my excitement over any challenge I overcame and being unafraid to face them with me. 

I am grateful for the time I had with you.  You gave me permission to live a greater life than I’d have lived without you being part of it. I miss you and I hope you are proud of me. I hope you feel rewarded for all you accomplished during your lifetime and recognize yours was a life well lived. Thank you for the pieces you put in the right places.

You are loved and remembered for always.

You’re Granddaughter,

Monday, November 28, 2011

Getting A Rock Star Mindset

If you are interested in developing and maintaining your own Rockstar mindset, try the following:
  1. Find a Hero. (This can't just be anyone, it needs to be someone who really gets you pumped.)
  2. Act Like Who You Want To Be (Increases your chances of feeling it.  Therefore you will beleive and achieve it)
  3. Load up on inspiration (Such as the following:)
Positive Affirmation for success:

Friday, November 18, 2011

How To Make Miracles Happen

Dad, Me, Brother
I had a conversation with my Dad.  This is a big deal.

Back in January, I almost lost him due to kidney failure.  He was in between worlds and chose to come back and continue life a while longer.  For this reason, I feel that every day with him is a miracle.

While not conscious for several weeks, I wrote journal entries about how he would return to us healthy and strong.  I came across another one, when he was struggling to figure out what was going on when he woke up.   

"Whatever the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve." - Napolean Hill

I wrote about how amazing he mentally began to function, how his personality would return peacefully and full of life.  He would return to us and we would be reunited. 

The miracle took place.

My Sweetie, Me
It’s not the first time this kind of experience has happened to me.  How else could I have landed such an incredible relationship?  

I spent several months before landing a guy by writing it down ad describing what our life was like.  As though wishing on a star, it all came true.

Every day with my guy and every day with my Dad is a great one.  It's like we've stolen back time.

Dad taught me about dreams, to appreciate when people who have passed on can visit us and we get extra time with them in our dreams. 

We talked about jobs, the economy, stocks, bonds, the private versus public sector.  Although he's a deep guy, he still would be able to appreciate things like this:

It’s enthralling to be aware of how we can create our futures.  I look forward to miracles we will create.  The way society has been making a crazy turn for the “who-knows-where-we’re-going,” a quote from the conversation with my Dad stands out:

"The only way out of this mess is to start working as a team.”
Blessing your way,

Jessi Lohman
Author Befriending Death
ItWorks Independent Distributor 

10 Killer Tips About Being Exceptional From Biggest Loser Ninja Jillian Michaels

Who wouldn’t want to pick the brain of gorgeous, brilliant, washboard stomach, strength in storms personal coach, Jillian Michaels?

Here are 10 Killer Tips of Ninja-Wisdom she used behind the scenes of The Biggest Loser to help her team pull ahead.

In her guide to building an exceptional life, Unlimited, she shares both personal and public victories as well as challenges revolving around her life and career.
My personal take away from the book (This is a fraction of what I’d like to share with you), includes a system of planning your goals. 

She introduced to me the Goal Pyramid. You begin at the top, identifying your long term goal (approx. 1 year out). Second you identify what must take place each month for you to reach that goal. The you break it down by weekly goals and finally daily goals.  So long as you hit the small goals, one after the other, it will eventually take you to your victorious Long Term Goal.


One thing I can guarantee: You have not seen her in a light like this. She is vulnerable, human and heartfelt, as she shares exactly how she went from bumpkin-hood to thriving stardom.

1.  Identify Your Passion (Make sure you are pursuing avenues that are in alignment with your moral center).

"When you want something, the whole universe conspires in helping you achieve it." - Paulo Coehlo

 2. Recognize You Are a Force (You can access all the insight and power needed to achieve anything you want).

"No positive thought or hope goes unrewarded." - Jillian

3. Believe In Yourself (You are not a victim of life but a participant in it.)

4. Take Responsibility For Your Life.

5. Adjust Your Attitude To Get The Most Out Of Life.

"Your thoughts affect your behaviors, your behaviors create your reality." - Jillian
6. Stop Selling Yourself Short.

"People will treat you as bad as you let them." - Jillian

7. Hit The Books- Then Hit The Deck.

"Education brings focus to all your endeavors." - Jillian

8. Get Organized.

"Writing your goals makes them real and forced you to form an emotional connection to them." - Jillian

9.  Create The Right Environment.

"Paramount to your success is gaining control over your immediate environment." - Jillian

10. Learn To Communicate.

"Nobody ever really does anything alone." - Eleanor Roosevelt

"If you can't communicate, you're F*cked." - Jillian

In her own words: 

In parting, a final quote by Neale Donald Walsch and a video where Jillian goes a little nuts over Thanksgiving calories:

“The person standing on the mountaintop did not get there by falling.
You have to climb to where you want to go -- and you cannot get there by climbing over others. It is about climbing with others, side by side, and even pulling some others up with you."

Cheers to your success!

Your Friend,


Author Befriending Death

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

It's Not Just Me... My Whole Family is Outside the Box

I wrote 3 pages of items to include in my blog this week - 3 pages!  And I lost them all.  Thumbs down, but it's alright because this keeps the blog much shorter for readers to get through. The funny thing, is items I lose have a habit of showing back up just in time for me not to need them anymore.

If I trashed this blog, for example, my notes would turn up the next day.

What's point of having a pen and paper always handy if your chicken scratch goes on vacation without you?  I could really use a vacation!  Let me tell you why.

Laundry isn't my favorite.  I'm known for frequenting 'fluff and fold' services at local laundromats more often than grocery shopping. I've made it a point, after receiving some pretty fabulous feedback from my brother.

"If you are really serious about your #1 life goal of being debt free... it would be a step in the right direction to give that up right now."

I think he's got a point.  It was my goal for 2011 to be debt free by the end of the year.  Here we are and it's November, and I am nowhere near close.  A few more good tips and I'll be well on my way. I've already got the automatic bill pay down and I stopped buying things to make me happy. Instead I got a really cool boyfriend.

Yet I can tell you one thing for sure.  Laundry at our house is one of the most inefficient chores imaginable.  I want to choke out our dryer.

You have to dry 'half' loads, 3 times before you take it out.  Neither me nor he is a laundering novice, the machine is just plain lazy.  I guess I can't put it down, since I'm such an advocate of Dr. Seuss's philosophy.

Speaking of faults of mine, the Post Office.  Why does it take me so long to mail crap?  If you are the victim of this mindless procrastinational mystery- I apologize.

I should stop the madness and end the cycle but the challenge is steep.


See you next time!